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Well, today was my first day at my new grown-up job in Denver. It was good – I think I’ll enjoy the job. I sense that it will really refine my writing skills and add to my abilities. The people are wonderful. It will be challenging. In short, it’s all exciting.
The weirdest thing is being alone in this. I have never before gotten a job, started a job, without having my parents around to share in that experience, to be my “boosters”. It’s been years and years since I’ve had a job and not had someone to come home to, or at least share my day with on the phone. It really emphasizes my sense of loneliness.
I couldn’t sleep last night – I was nervous, excited, my stomach was in turmoil, I was missing my parents. I had a weepy few hours, and wished there was someone I could call in the darkness when I couldn’t sleep. I miss that. I guess I was kind of hoping….well, it just would have been nice.
As I said, I had a really good day, but I was weepy again going home. Sigh. I know I am moving forward – no, upward. But I am still sad. And still hurt. And still kind of lonely.
Tomorrow, I’m going to take the bus! It may not sound exactly thrilling, but I’m excited – something else I’ve never done before.
I feel like I’m a little kid starting school again.
I spent a lot of time last weekend reading up on how to start my business, get clients, etc. I would get very motivated, very excited…and then very intimidated. It became positively overwhelming — making lists of potential clients and contacts, finding a web hosting service, considering brochures, letters, business cards, direct mail, sample, and on and on.
I retreated to the safety of the same book that inspired the angst – The Well Fed Writer – and it was somewhat comforting. There’s just so very much to do to create a business presence in the freelance world. But I’m doing it. I spent this morning working on a website – hosting through FatCow is fairly easy, but I don’t really like the template options that they’ve offered me. Still, it’ll do for now, until I can upgrade to something spiffier. At least it’s one bite out of the elephant.
So what’s on the agenda for this afternoon? I guess it’s the next bite – starting to look for possible jobs and making that client/call list.
