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That’s the little sign on the corner of my computer monitor. The little sign at the top of the computer monitor says “All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveller is unaware.” Both are pretty apt for me these days.
I am getting ready to leave my job – well, more accurately, my job is leaving me – on Friday. I’ve been coming here off and on for almost nine years to the day. That’s a long time. It will be strange not to drive up, walk through the doors, settle at my desk. Fortunately, at least in my head, the company is moving everyone into our “back-up” building, into a completely different environment/layout/set-up, so I comfort myself by thinking that it would be very different anyway. Had I stayed, I might have switched to full-time work-at-home – which I’m going to do anyway with my own business.
But what I will really miss (aside from the steady paycheck) is the support system. I’ve known the women I work with for a long time:
Kathy: 9 years – she heard my sorrow over losing my Mom daily; I’ve helped her through dating, marriage and two kids, and we’ve been each other’s moral support through some hellacious work schedules for the past 7 months
Kathy: 9 years – she was first my boss, and then she became my friend; she helped me move out when I left Pat
Denise: 5 years – very much like a sister to me
Kris: 20 years – we’ve been together at two companies and through the deaths of my parents and her dad
Debbie: 4 years – we compare notes about our kids
Colleen: 4 years – we’re talking about painting houses together in the summer
Christine: 5 year – we’ve always wanted to go out together, but we agree that might be dangerous – a big support for me during times of transition
With all of these women, I have shared tears, laughter, dreams, and rants. At times, they were the only positive thing about coming to work. While I know that I don’t need to let the relationships go, I’ve never been good at maintaining relationships, and the dynamic changes once you’re “out” when they’re still “in.” I want to change my old pattern of letting people go, and try to keep these women in my life.
I know that some of them are closely following my plan for working independently, and wishing they could pursue their own dreams. They’re watching to see how I do. After all, if I can do it, they can do it.
So I owe it to them, as well as to myself, to be fearless.